Home Alone doormat: leave it on the doorstep and get the hell outta here

Kevin McCallister had the right idea. The pizza guy doesn't need to come in, and neither does anybody else. This rude Home Alone doormat quotes the greatest delivery instructions in movie history, so drivers know exactly what to do: drop it, back away, keep the change, ya filthy animal.

Pick natural coir, 16"x24" up to 36"x72", for a covered porch, or go all-weather (18"x30" or 30"x47") and hose it off anywhere. It's the funny Christmas doormat for people who watch Home Alone every December and order takeout more than they'll admit. Ask Tammy Sandwiches, our doormat matchmaker. She's a very good dog and she won't judge you. Or read How do I choose a doormat?