This season, go real old school with your porch decor...

The world's first "Beware of Dog" sign is 2,000 years old.

CAVE CANEM — the  original Roman mosaic in Pompeii, reborn as a nerdy dog parent's doormat.

Joined by Welcomes in Greek, Arabic, Korean, Irish…      and yes, tons of sarcastic fucking doormats.

Less classy, more sassy doormats

50,000+ front porches can't all be wrong    4000+ real reviews and fan photos from real doorways. 

Who are we?

The Original Custom Doormat Shop. 

We Invented This. You're Welcome.

In 2009, we invented the funny, rude & custom doormat. Not kidding — before Damn Good Doormats, the custom doormat for regular folx didn't exist, and every funny doormat you've seen since is basically a knockoff.

Seventeen years later, we're still the original: an independent, queer woman owned shop, no big-box bullshit. From a 2,000-year-old Roman dog to Welcomes in your grandma's language to mats that swear on your behalf — every one is unapologetic and built to be as unique your front door.

How it works

Three steps between you and a smarter doorstep

Not sure which mat is you? That's what How to Choose a Doormat is for — or ask Perogi, Queen of Pugs, our on-site matchmaker.

From funny un-welcome doormats to offensive, rude Fuck Off designs, we have doormats to fit every sarcastic home.

NAUGHTY DOORMATS

From Boho Homes, ASL, Pop Culture Quotes to Language doormats, these mats put the fun in functional gifting. 

NICE DOORMATS

Nerdy fandom is our speciality! From Binary codes to Tolkien Quotes - nerdy boyfriend & programmer gifts! 

NERDY DOORMATS

Cult Movies, living languages, one very good dog from the year 79. Welcome mats with a pedigree.

BEST SELLING DOORMATS