Let's drink wine and judge people

The two best hobbies, combined. This rude doormat is for the porch crew that critiques every passerby, glass in hand.

Get it in natural coir (16"x24" to 36"x72", keep it covered) or all-weather (18"x30" or 30"x47") that survives rain and your in-laws. Give it to the wine mom, the book club and the neighbor who always knows the gossip. It's on the way out and it isn't coming back. Like your ex, but you'll miss this one. Stuck on size? Tammy Sandwiches, our doormat matchmaker (a very good dog), will sort you out, or read How do I choose a doormat?