Welcome to our Stabbin Cabin

Wink, wink. This rude cabin doormat is a not-so-subtle welcome for the lake house, the hunting camp or the A-frame Airbnb where couples go to get away from everyone else.

Coir comes in sizes from 16"x24" to 36"x72" and wants a roof over its head. The all-weather version (18"x30" or 30"x47") doesn't care about anything, much like you. It's the gag gift for the guy who owns a cabin and the couple who just bought one. We were making rude doormats in 2009, before the copycats caught on. Stuck on size? Tammy Sandwiches, our doormat matchmaker (a very good dog), will sort you out, or read How do I choose a doormat?