Somebody's fist just came down on your door like they're serving a warrant. Pulse spikes, dog loses its mind, you peek through the blinds bracing for red and blue lights — and it's just your neighbor asking to borrow a phone charger. This funny doormat says the quiet part loud before anyone else traumatizes your dog: knock hard if you have to, but not like the police. There's a difference, and now every porch visitor knows it.
We've been doing this since 2009 — the original sarcastic doormat company, thank you, copycats came later. Grab it in eco coir, our bestselling front door mat material, in 8 sizes running apartment-door tiny to Double door big, for a covered porch out of the sun and rain. Rougher entryway? Go all-weather fabric front mat with a recycled rubber non-slip backing — rain, snow, or an overzealous delivery guy, just hose it off and move on. Either way it's a genuinely funny welcome mat, and a gift for the person on your list who complains about literally everyone (they'll know it's about them).
Hang it by the door and let it screen out the aggressive knockers before they even ring the bell. Not sure which size or material's right for your entryway? Ask Perogi, our chatbot assistant (a very good pug, zero badge energy), or read How Do I Choose a Doormat?
