Who it's for: For the one who writes thank-you notes on monogrammed stationery and still tells people to fuck off.

Classy Fuck Off doormat: a rude welcome mat with manners

Some people need to hear it. Not everyone deserves to hear it shouted. This rude doormat says Fuck Off with the posture of a duchess who is done with your nonsense. Your neighbors will read it twice. The guy selling solar panels will read it once and leave.

Pick natural coir, 16"x24" up to 36"x72", for a covered porch, or go all-weather (18"x30" or 30"x47") and hose it off anywhere. It's an offensive doormat for people with standards, and a gift for the friend who swears beautifully. We were making rude doormats in 2009, before the copycats caught on.

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